Great Metrano Week: Day three

To celebrate this weeks birthday boy Art Metrano this reviewer kicked off a week long look at 7 guest starring roles from the 70's & 80's by the man also known as The Great Metrano. Today is day three: Charlie's Angels: Angels in Paradise.

Originally show as a two hour special, this episode is well remembered for introducing Cheryl Ladd as 'Jill's little sister' Kris Munroe and for being shot on location in Hawaii. You can imagine the pre-broadcast excitement: will we see all three Angels in a bikini? No such luck with Kate Jackson still in the cast. In season one, Jaclyn Smith was the least experienced Angel and therefore had to wear a bikini in every other episode. This season (and also the next), it's New Girl Cheryl's turn. 

Unfortunately, as is usually the case with these two hour specials, the real reason this episode is twice as long is to compensate for the location shooting. That way they can make two episodes for the price of one, and indeed even on DVD 'Angels in Paradise' is split in two like it is in reruns and syndication. Could it be possible that the original two hour cut has been lost? And while the episode certainly offers a lot of nice things to look at, the script , convoluted though it is, has to be padded out with a lot of hula dancing every other scene. Also, there are two different villains who are both after the same thing: one for part one and the other for part two. 

After her introduction, we learn that Kris secretly attended the police academy in San Fran, possibly funded by her sister Jill who assumed she was in college. Then Charlie calls them up sounding chipper as ever, only to tell the Angels he's been kidnapped and could be killed. The four Townsned detectives fly to Hawaii and have a Mai Tai on the beach. But the first bikini on screen clings to villain number one, Leilani Sako, who rises from the sea Honey Ryder style. She then explains that her men kidnapped Charlie because she wants the Angels to bust her husband Billy out of jail. We also learn why Charlie's phone call was so cheerful: he's being treated like a prince (as always) at Leilani's estate. 

While the Angels never play it for comedy like that other Spelling/Goldberg TV show reviewed yesterday, they sure are having quite a lot of fun vacationing while their boss is supposedly in mortal danger and they are being forced to break the law (also a young surfing girl gets shot for no good reason). They never actually break Billy out of jail, but free him by dressing Bosley up in a wig and doing the old car switcheroo. Once they have Billy, Leilani is no longer harboring Charlie. He's been kidnapped (off screen) for the second time. As proof we only see some broken crockery on the floor at Leilani's mansion. 

The Great Metrano, who should have been the main villain all along, finally appears as Mr. Blue, a man 'both dangerous and ridiculous'. He lives life like James Bond and also wants to swap Charlie for Billie. He's also the only villain (actually the only character other than the usual bimbo's) who interacts with Charlie on a face to face basis. Of course it's not really John Forsythe sitting opposite Art because when Forsythe took the voice-over job he swore never to set foot on the set, and Blake Carrington always keeps his word.

If you're watching this episode in two parts, at least the cliffhanger in kind of interesting: the corpse of a man with Charlie's wallet washes up on the beach and none of the girls can identify him because they've never seen his face. But it's another red herring, of course. Then we get a boring bit in which boring Billy recounts how he met and fell in love with Leilani to a bored looking Bosley.

The girls spend another scene being cute and practicing the Hula while waiting for a phone call that proves that Charlie's still alive. This is followed by a useless detour of new angel Kris going to a nude beach to talk to Mr. Roper (Norman Fell). Poor little Kris. being the new girl, she has to go 'nude' on her first outing. But we actuality see more of Norman Fell (at least from the waste up). That must have pleased the seventies TV viewers a lot. 

Well at least the Angels get to do a lot of detective work all around Honolulu until they find out Charlie must be held on Blue's yacht. Meanwhile they are still keeping stupid Billy as a bargaining chip and he never once objects. He's all smiles and doesn't even mind going back to jail if it means can take Mr. Blue along with him. 

Finally the Angels, joined by silly Billy, infiltrate Blue's Boat to save Charlie. Now we have both Kris and Kelly in teeny bikinis. Some of this footage is so memorable that it appears in the opening credits up until the last season. But just when Sabrina is just one door removed from saving Charlie, he takes matters into his own hands, jumps out a little window and swims to shore. Obviously nothing is more frightening to Charlie than to meet his Angels face to face. 

The wrap up back at the office features still more hula dancing (including some by Bosley). Then, as Charlie calls, we cut to footage from an earlier scene just before he was kidnapped. This makes it appear like a 'here-we-go-again- tag' even though it isn't. 

7 out of 10

The Great Metrano week will continue tomorrow with Wonder Woman: Skateboard Wiz